What Are You Learning?

My mom started a weekly series called "What Are You Learning?" so that we can share with each other what God is teaching us, and so I decided to participate. If you'd like to share what God is teaching you, click on the link at the end of this post.


"Jesus is...asking for an internal sacrifice and yielding." (Oswald Chambers)

Complete surrender is so difficult! Lately I've been thinking about surrender and what it means, and honestly, I've had difficulty accepting the fact that God desires, well, total surrender, not just little bits and pieces of my life.

Total surrender means stepping out of my comfort zone! It means allowing Him to point me in a direction that I may not want to go! It means letting Him get all the glory and possibly not getting any for myself!

When I look at total surrender through my limited human perspective, it sounds miserable. Yet when I look at it through the lens of God's Word and realize that He's had my life planned out to the smallest, minutest detail since before the beginning of time; and when I remember that total surrender equals true joy (if not happiness), I'm filled with a sense of peace and gratefulness. God--the Creator of a universe so complex and enormous that the most brilliant scientific minds could not possibly understand it completely--that same God stoops down and carries me through this life. He works each detail of my life into His perfect plan!

Certainly, a God like that deserves my total surrender to His will! He deserves every ounce of my life!

I recently read this excerpt from "My Utmost for His Highest" (can you tell I enjoy this book??):

It is of no value to God to give Him your life for death. He wants you to be a "living sacrifice"--to let Him have all your strengths that have been saved and sanctified through Jesus (Romans 12:1). This is what is acceptable to God.

God wants all of me. He wants the gifts He has given me to be used for His glory. He wants my very existence to direct glory to Him.

I fall so pitifully short of total surrender, but God is always patient! Thank You Father!

If you want to participate in "What Are You Learning?" just visit my mom's blog and link your post to

But I WANT It!!

Sometimes I feel dumb when people ask me, "So, what do you want to be when you get older?" I feel dumb because I'm really not sure what I want to do...as far as a professional career goes. I enjoy music, and that's what I'm majoring in right now, but I don't have a "passion" for it.

Quite honestly, the only "career" that I know I want is that of a wife and mother. Ever since I was a kid, that's been my one strong desire. And now that I'm 18, that desire is stronger than ever, especially since, technically, I'm old enough to be in a serious relationship (although at this point, I know for a fact I'm not ready for one! :-)

I often talk with my mom about my desire for romance and marriage, and about the struggles I face as a college freshman surrounded, not only by guys my age, but also by other girls who have their own boyfriends.

It's not just romance, though. I'm developing other desires as I grow and mature. Desires for more independence. I want to "do things on my own," like get a job, go out with friends, etc. However, my parents (and God) repeatedly remind me to trust in His timing and plan, and to not rush into things based on emotion and impulse.

For no particularly profound reason, I recently decided to start reading through 1 Kings. Chapters 1-2 tell the story of Adonijah, David's oldest surviving son, and of his desire to be "independent." He wanted his father David's throne, despite the fact that God had given that throne to his younger brother, Solomon. So, behind his father's back, he crowned himself king. With lots of friends cheering him on, he held his own coronation ceremony! He even performed the appropriate religious rituals and sacrifices.

When David found out, he held his own coronation ceremony for Solomon. Adonijah, realizing the trouble he was in, got scared and decided to submit to his brother's authority. However, he eventually resumed his quest for power, and as a result, Solomon had him executed.

What a lesson! Adonijah desired to be king. He desired to be independent. Yet his rebellion and persistence in resisting God's will cost him his life.

This story challenged me, and it reinforced what I've been taught for a long time: God's timing and will are best. If I push for what I want now (romance, independence, my own way, etc.), I will certainly regret it! It doesn't matter how many friends I get on my side; Adonijah had plenty of outside support. It doesn't matter what religious motions I go through to justify my rebellion; Adonijah made the required sacrifices to God. Getting my way in opposition to God's way is always sinful.

What if I decided to push for romance...and got my way? I would probably end up in a stressful relationship that would divert my focus from my present callings of being a student and a daughter. I could place myself in a dangerous situation that caused me to compromise my purity and end up married to the completely wrong guy!

What if I decided to force my independence...and got my way? I could end up holding a job with a horrible atmosphere and many potentially dangerous influences that could pull me down spiritually.

It's scary, but it's true! I'm so thankful that God is using His Word and my parents to warn me and to impress these truths into my mind and heart.

Father,

help me to pursue Your plan and purpose for my life.
Help me to focus on Your will for me,
and not to pursue my will for me.
Thank You for Your promises to meet all of my needs,
and thank you for the truth that if marriage
is a part of Your plan for me,
and if gaining a little more Independence
is in Your will,
You will provide all that is necessary!
I love You!
Amen.

What a Head-ful!!!

Whew!!!!

What a semester! The whole 4 months has been nothing but one big learning experience (that's why I've had trouble keeping up with you guys...)!

So...what has God taught me during these last few months?

1) College takes DISCIPLINE! Thankfully, I have some natural organizational skills. However, I don't know what I would do without Mom to help me lay out a schedule, focus on completing homework, and distract me when I need to be distracted! :-) My Dad is there to proof-read papers and to cheer me up when I am stressed (which is all too often!).

My brother...well...he provides the comic relief!

2) Staying in tune with God is vital. Keeping up with my devotions has proved especially difficult lately, especially with the never-ending homework, time-consuming piano practice, early morning volleyball workouts, church twice a week, precious family time, late study-nights (no all-nighters yet!)...I am ashamed to say that I was not as consistent in the Word as I should have been, especially during the first few weeks of school.

I realized early on what a difference it makes when I miss my quiet time. I began to see myself giving into temptations more easily. I saw how much harder it was to stand alone in a crowd.

Over and over again, God reminded me that a busy schedule is not an excuse to stop spending time in His Word! In fact, it is the very reason why I must stay in His Word!

Thanks to God, I have grown in this area. Yet, I still have a long ways to go. Praise God for His never-ending patience!

3) I must rely on God, not people. As I started the school year, I had high hopes of developing at least one tight, godly friendship. I am realizing that those expectations are not always realistic. I have made some new friends, but for various reasons, my schedule included, it's been difficult to develop close and godly friendships.

My mom and I have had many long talks on this subject, and I am slowly realizing that I need to trust in God's plans and timing. I need to draw close to Him and not place my hope in human companionship, not even that of other Christians.

4) I am so thankful for my family! I am meeting so many different kids with so many types of backgrounds; sometimes their stories amaze me! I praise God for how He has blessed me with a safe home, godly parents, and a wonderful church.

5) I am so thankful for church family. I especially want to praise God for my friend Courtney. We met when I was only 7 years old, when her family started attending our church. We've been friends ever since! Over this semester, I've grown to appreciate her more and more. She is a godly, talented young women who is striving to honor God and is always there for me when I need to talk about "stuff."

I am seeing more and more how difficult it is to find solid, godly friends. God has blessed me so much through Courtney!

~~~~~~~

There is a boatload more to learn, and I am somewhat excited--somewhat apprehensive--about what God's going to teach me next semester!

Right now...I'm just enjoying my BREAK!!

Cookie baking, Christmas shopping, room-organizing...
and lots and lots of SLEEPING!! :-)

I'm SUCH A LAZY BUM!

Well, not all of the time! But seriously...

So many times I slack off on the essentials, like...

~Quiet time...one that I've put effort into, not slept
through and then checked off my to-do list.

~Relationships...making the effort to be a godly
friend/sister/daughter, even when it gets hard.

~Self-control...not giving into my emotions at the
difficult moments, but focusing on God and on how He wants me to respond.

~Standing alone...saying "no" to temptation...even when it's
super, super, super hard!!

...among numerous others.

Basically, I don't always DO THE HARD THING.

I know I'm not the only one who slacks...but I've also been convicted recently that I can't become complacent. I can't become content where I am in my spiritual walk. I must be so sensitive to the Holy Spirit as He pushes me towards a God/cross-focused life.

God will finish what He's started in me, no matter how I choose to live my life, either in this life or the one to come! THANK YOU GOD!

But...I DO NOT want waste my time here...the time that HE has entrusted to me...just "getting by."

I recently heard my teacher talk about 2 Thessalonians 3:13-

"And as for you, brethren, do not become weary or lose heart in doing right [but continue in well-doing without weakening]." (Amplified Bible)

He explained that the word "weary" actually implies "lazy." "Do not become [LAZY] in doing right." That insight placed a whole new spin on the verse for me. Way too often, I blame my laziness on "just being too tired" or "weak," when I should be humbled and repentant because of my careless attitude towards His love for me. I demonstrate this carelessness when I classify my Christian walk with "the mundane" or the "daily routine" and cease pushing forward.

Oh God, do a work in my heart! Forgive my laziness...please, PLEASE continue to remind me that I need to let YOU guide and control me; I can't ignore the Hard Things that are essential to honoring You. I must not take the love You showed me on the cross for granted!! Keep waking me up, Lord!

Thanks for your PATIENCE with me! Amen.

And yes...that is my cat! :-)

God-vision

The other day in class, one of my professors repeated a quote he had heard once; it is so challenging and goes against everything my flesh desires. The quote was,

Don't sacrifice the ultimate on the altar of the immediate.

He also warned that "it's really easy to give up the potential of tomorrow for the glory of today."
Wow!
This professor was talking about the importance of vision in the Christian life. And no...he was NOT talking about the stereotypical "vision" that so many people, believers and nobelievers alike, strive for...you know...the "follow-your-heart-and-do-what-you-want-to-do" kind of vision. No, he was talking about "seeing beyond today"...realizing that, most of the time, following fleshly impulses is a dangerous thing.
My professor went on to say that the Christian also needs "Clear and convicted decisions." They must know "where they're going," and they must be determined that they are "not going to sell out to anyone but Jesus Christ." Amen Professor Leigh!

Dear Lord,

Help me to stay focused on You.

It's so hard sometimes; hundreds of different things

divert my attention from You and Your truth every day.

So often I give into my flesh,

dwelling on those subjects that are either impure and foolish,

or unnecessary and unimportant.

Help me to stay focused on YOUR TRUTH.

Help me to have God-vision:

vision that is zeroed in on living for and selling out to You ALONE.

Help me to "Do Hard Things,"

and to never "sacrifice the ultimate on the altar of the immediate."

Thank You so much for Your incredible and unending

patience.

Amen.

Oh yeah...BLOGGING....

Remember me?!?!?! I'm that person who used to post 2-3 times a week...I'm very sorry that I haven't posted in so long!

I have several good excuses for why I haven't been consistently posting and several not so good ones...the good ones are 1) our Internet has been down for several days and just started working today, and 2) COLLEGE involves a lot of WORK!

Wow...novel concept... :-)

I'd like to share several prayer requests along with several praises to God. I'll PTL first...

1) I love my Bible classes. I am taking two this semester, and both of them are challenging me spiritually. They "force" me to study God's Word regularly and from a different perspective than I have had in the past.

2) My music classes are definitely stretching me mentally; that's a good thing. I have two of these classes, and, well, let's just say that I'm honestly astounded that people actually sit down and think up all of this theory stuff!!! I'm also experiencing what it's like to be in a choir (GO ALTOS!) . I've never been a choir member before, and so far it's been challenging and fun.

3) I'm greatly enjoying my experience on the volleyball team thus far. We had our first game yesterday afternoon; we played in NC and were gone from 7am-12am!! **HUGE SKULL BUSTING YAWN** We lost, but we had a BLAST!! :-) We also played pretty well, considering it was our first game...

4) I am SOOO thankful that I am able to live at home during college! My parents are so helpful, and I honestly don't know what I'd do without them.

Now for some prayer requests.

1) Please pray that I will learn to use my time wisely and efficiently. I always get my work done on time, but I tend to procrastinate as much as possible. I also need to plan out my day so that I have time for QT...which I know is vital as I strive to grow in my spiritual walk.

2) Pray that I'd learn to control my emotions. I STRESS over a lot of stuff--everything from homework to volleyball to friendships--and I know that I MUST bring my emotions under Christ's control if I want to glorify God throughout these years in college (not to mention the rest of my life).

3) Please pray that I would be bold and that I would be sensitive to the Holy Spirit as I experience situations which challenge me to stand alone. It is so hard!!! I think college is going to stretch me mentally, physically, and spiritually; it will force me to make choices between doing the "easy thing" and doing the "Hard Thing."

4) Please pray that I would have the attitude of John the Baptist: "He must increase and I must decrease." I am constantly tempted to zero in on myself and to forget that there are others around me who need encouragement and love. I have a responsibility to build up my brothers and sisters in Christ, no matter how I feel at any given point in time.

Thanks for being patient with me as try to fit blogging into my schedule. Hopefully I'll be able to post at least twice a week; however, it may be a week or two before I get into "the groove." Just know that I am NOT dumping this blog or the blogs of my friends...I love you guys and I love blogging...

No Fear!

2 Timothy 1:7: "For God has not given us a spirit of fearfulness, but one of power, love, and sound judgment."

Such a familiar, simple, yet profound statement. "God has not given us a spirit of fearfulness."

Think about that...we have no reason to fear anything: not temptation, not trials, not the high cost of standing alone. When we're faced with a tough decision, we don't have to freak out and and make a rushed choice. We can make a choice based on "sound judgement." God gives wisdom. Hallelujah!

I'm starting school next Tuesday, and I've already started pre-season volleyball workouts. I know I will be faced with tough choices (in fact, I already have). I don't have to shy away from righteousness because I'm scared of what people might think or because it's just plain easier to NOT do the "hard thing." The same power that "raised Christ from the dead" resides in me. I have been given a spirit of power. God gives strength. Hallelujah!

Just some thoughts...

Musical Monday

As I get ready to start college, I'm trying to prepare myself, both mentally and spiritually, for the challenges that are ahead. I'm trying to memorize verses that will help me as I face temptation and overwhelming circumstance. I've also discovered how listening to music with powerful lyrics can encourage me to walk with God...and I've discovered a new CD that contains just such music: "Come Weary Saints", by Sovereign Grace Music. The song below (one of the tracks from the CD) is especially beautiful.

Every Day

by Todd Twining and Joel Sczebel

In Your grace, You know where I walk
You know when I fall
You know all my ways
In Your love, I know You allow
What I cannot grasp
To bring You praise

Thank You for the trials
For the fire, for the pain
Thank You for the strength
Knowing You have ordained
Every day

Your great power is shown when I’m weak
You help me to see
Your love in this place
Perfect peace is filling my mind
And drawing my heart
To praise You again

In my uncertainty, Your Word is all I need
To know You’re with me every day

~~~~~~~

Absolutely beautiful! What an incredibly challenging and encouraging song!!

Check Out This Oh-So-Challenging Article...

No Little People
by...or should I say "through"...Tim Sweetman

I found this link through the Rebelution website.

Here's a peek...

"...it's not about who we are in the public eye. It's about who God is. He works through us, and it's His grace alone that allows us to do anything, that brings meaning to the mundane. It was none of Moses' work that saved the Israelites. God received all the credit. I've found that when I put too much credit in 'big' people or 'small' people, I take away from God's fame and glory. "'God so used a stick of wood' can be a banner cry for each of us," wrote Francis Schaeffer. 'Though we are limited in talent, physical energy, and psychological strength, we are not less than a stick of wood. But as the rod of Moses had to become the rod of God, so that which is me must become the me of God. Then I can become useful in God's hands.'

I want to be a stick of wood. His stick of wood..."

To read the rest of this article, click on the link above...

Cleaning Off the Shelves

In preparation for my first semester of college, which starts on the 25th, I've been cleaning out my room. I want to have plenty of room for BOOKS, and I also want to start the year in an organized fashion.

So today I cleaned off my bookshelves and re-organized my closet. I threw out some junk, and packed away lots of old books...Nancy Drew, Elsie Dinsmore, Boxcar Children, Little House...:-( It's almost hilarious how much shelf space I had after putting those books away! Aren't my shelves beautiful?!?!

All that cleaning reminds me of how I need to ask God to clean out the junk that's in my heart. I know that I must not become complacent in my spiritual walk; if I want to stay close to God and bring glory to Him, I must allow God to scrape out all of the "gunk." I've seen a lot of "gunk" and "junk" in my heart lately. Even though I can become overwhelmed by all the stuff I need to work on, I'm also grateful for this evidence of the Holy Spirit in my life. I'm grateful that He's shown me my faults, and that I know what I need to work on.

Just like cleaning off my shelves enabled me to use the space more efficiently, allowing God to clean out my sin-filled heart allows me to be more powerfully used by God. Isn't that so cool?

Psalm 139:23-24~"Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my concerns. See if there is any offensive way in me; lead me in the everlasting way."

Spreading the Word...

Lately I've been thinking about my responsibility to share the Gospel. I recently read the following passage from Matthew (the Great Commission):

"Then Jesus came near and said to them, 'All authority has been given to Me in heaven and on earth. Go, therefore, and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe everything I have commanded you. And remember, I am with you always, to the end of the age.'"

Now, like most of you, I've heard those verses over, and over, and over, and over...but they usually just bounce in one ear and out the other! The last time I read them, however, I read my Bible's footnote about those verses. It said:

"All authority has been given to Me in heaven and on earth. This is the meaning of the statement 'Jesus is Lord.' Since there is no power greater than His (Rom. 8:38-39; Phil. 2:9-11; Col. 1:15-20) there is no other loyalty to which His disciples can give their absolute allegiance."

I looked up the above mentioned verses; here they are:

Romans 8:38-39: "For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing will have the power to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord!"

Philippians 2:9-11: "For this reason God also highly exalted Him and gave Him
the name that is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus every
knee should bow--of those who are in heaven and on earth and under the
earth--and every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to
the glory of God the Father."

Colossians 1:15-20: "He is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn over all creation; because by Him everything was created, in heaven and on earth, the visible and the invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities--all things have been created through Him and for Him. He is before all things, and by Him all things hold together. He is also the head of the body, the church; He is the beginning, the firstborn from the dead, so that He might come to have first place in everything. For God was pleased to have all His fullness dwell in Him, and through Him to reconcile everything to Himself by making peace through the blood of His cross--whether things on earth or things in heaven."

Christ is supreme. He is Ruler of all. No circumstances, earthly rulers, physical health conditions...nothing has the power to separate us from His love! Not only that, but God the Father Himself exalted Christ to a position that is higher than any other in the universe. Whoa! I owe Him all of my worship and allegiance and awe! That last passage is especially amazing. It states that Christ is "the image" of God, the "firstborn over all creation." This passage also says that "all things have been created through Him and for Him."

I have been created "for Him." My whole goal in life should be to direct glory and attention to Him. I should live life with Him as my central focus.
Like the footnote in my Bible said, His absolute power and authority demand my complete allegiance...this includes the commitment to spread His glory to everyone and anyone that I can. One way I spread the Gospel is through my personal testimony; sometimes actions speak more loudly than words. But I shouldn't shy away from spreading the Gospel verbally, either. Personally, I am not good in this area. I have no excuse; I know I have had opportunities come my way.

Last summer, I worked for my dad during the summer sports camps that he runs; I was his "administrative assistant." :-) I also helped set up lunch every morning, along with several other junior counselors who were around my age. Several of these kids were Catholic in name, but they obviously did not understand who Christ was. This was evident by the questions they asked me about my faith. I remember one day when one of the young girls asked me, "So, what do you believe?" I proceeded to explain that I believed Christ had died on the cross, thereby redeeming us from sin, and then rose again on the third day. I kind of laughed to myself when, as another junior counselor walked in, this young lady told him cheerfully, "I've been finding out about her religion!" It was strange to have someone call Christianity a "religion," even though I know that's the way the world sees faith in Christ's redemption. Isn't is it tragic that this young girl, and millions like her, see this incredible personal relationship with Christ as "just another religion"?

Unfortunately, I did not let this feeling drive me to fearlessly share why my faith was not just another religion. I shared what I believed, but I "tippy-toed" in sharing...I didn't want to freak them out!Even though I shared the gospel, I could feel myself (then and throughout the week) shying away from being really bold in proclaiming the gospel. I didn't want to offend them. I didn't want them to think I was "weird" or "super conservative."

It's kind of funny, but when I'm out of that kind of that situation, I come up with the eloquent speeches and responses that I will give when someone asks me about my faith. I seem to think that it's sometimes "easy" to share the gospel. But it's not...for me! I don't like to initiate those kinds of conversations!

But after my QT the other day, I realized that I don't have any reason not to share the gospel! In fact, I owe it to Christ to share His glory! He is all-powerful...and yet so often I dare to ignore that power, shrugging off the responsibility to witness!

Something else I've been challenged with lately is that I can "witness" to other believers. I can and should be an example to my brothers and sisters in Christ. Like my story above demonstrates, I struggle with being a "people-pleaser" rather than a "God-pleaser." I'm like a chameleon at times; I try to blend into the crowd around me, even if "blending in" equals "compromising." But Christ expects more out of me...His child for whom He gave His life. The child who He loves with a love which cannot be weakened. Ever. I must strive to live up to His expectations, not the expectations of those around me.

Another thing: Christ experienced many, many "uncomfortable situations"...and He persevered through the most uncomfortable of them all: excruciating death on a cross. He also suffered betrayal by close friends, mockery...I mean, for crying out loud, He was spit on!! If He went through all that "uncomfortableness" for me, shouldn't I be willing to experience discomfort for His sake, so that I can in some way repay Him for all that He's done for me?

I just came across a video on Kaysie's blog, "Cross-Eyed", that happened to deal with how to share Christ despite our fears. I encourage you to check it out.

OK, so I've typed my head off and shared all this stuff...now I've got to go out and practice it!

Musical Monday

God of Justice (We Must Go)
by Tim Hughes

God of Justice, Saviour to all,
Came to rescue the weak and the poor,
Chose to serve and not be served.

Jesus, You have called us.
Freely we've received,
Now freely we will give.

We must go, live to feed the hungry,
Stand beside the broken,
We must go.
Stepping forward, keep us from just singing,
Move us into action,
We must go.

To act justly everyday,
Loving mercy in every way,
Walking humbly before You God,

You have shown us, what You require.
Freely we've received,
Now freely we will give.

Fill us up and send us out,
Fill us up and send us out,
Fill us up and send us out Lord.
~~~~~

We sang this song at the "Do Hard Things" Conference last Saturday. Isn't it so challenging? I love the lines, "Stepping forward, keep us from just singing, move us into action, we must go." Amen! What a kick to the ol' spiritual funny bone...the conscience, that is! It is so easy to forget those "moments of enlightenment." So often, I'll be strongly convicted concerning an area in which I am lacking...and then I'll move on with life...acting as if that conviction means nothing.

Father, "stepping forward, keep me from just blogging, move me into action, I must go!!"

Passion and Purity by Elizabeth Elliot

I recently started reading Passion and Purity by Elizabeth Elliot. Mrs. Elliot was the wife of Jim Elliot, the missionary who was killed by the Auca (Waodani) Indians in 1956. This book is the story of her relationship with Jim. Filled with snippets from her personal journals, as well as Bible verses, hymn lyrics, etc., it is the story of a young couple who greatly loved each other yet chose to wait. Not only did they maintain their purity, but they also made the difficult decision to hold off on marriage until they were certain of God's will for their lives. Neither one was certain that God wanted them to marry...ever. They both knew that going with their emotions and marrying outside of God's will would jeopardize their commitment to Christ and His glory. Though it was extremely difficult to rely on His perfect plan, which they realized could include singleness, they trusted God to make His will clear in His perfect timing. Below is an especially challenging portion of their story. It takes place right after they confessed their feelings for each other and committed, for the time being, to not become engaged.
E. Elliot says:

I began to learn to wait. Patient waiting does not come naturally to most of us, but a great deal is said about it in the Bible. It is an important discipline for anyone who wants to learn to trust....

[Journal entry from] June 9, 1948--....To wait on the Lord is to stand perfectly still....can [Jim and I] trust His words, "Is not the Lord your God with you? and hath he not given you rest on every side?..." (1 Chronicles 22:18)

....It was on the evening of the same day, June 9, that Jim and I walked out to a cemetery and sat down on a stone slab. I told him I did not think it would help us much in discerning God's direction if we started right in on a heavy correspondence. Wouldn't it make more sense to "cool it"? Not that we used that expression in those days, but it says what I meant. To allow for the perspective that both distance and silence could give might help us to see the whole thing with cool reason.
Jim thought that over for a few minutes. Then he spoke of the story he had read in his Bible study that morning--the story of Abraham's offering up of the most precious thing in his life: his son Isaac. "So I put you on the altar," he said.
Slowly we became aware that the moon, which had risen behind us, was casting the shadow of a stone cross on the slab between us.
We were silent for a very long time, pondering this undeniable sign. What Abraham did was the ancient prelude to the full revelation of the love of God. The readiness to give up his son and the rewards promised because of it--again, the central truth of the Cross was brought to us in a strange and mysterious manner. When the silence became heavy, Jim said, "And what is to be done with the ashes?" Time would show.

What a challenging story! Two people who were willing to give up what their flesh longed for the most in order to follow God's design and purpose for their lives! They were willing to keep Christ and the truth of the Cross at the center of their hearts.
Lord, I pray that You would plant within me a desire to follow You alone, and that I would be willing to give up what I want so that You might be glorified and honored through my life. Amen.

Musical Monday

Be Thou My Vision

by Dallan Forgail

Be Thou my Vision,
O Lord of my heart;
Naught be all else to me,
save that Thou art
Thou my best Thought,
by day or by night,
Waking or sleeping,
Thy presence my light.

Be Thou my Wisdom,
and Thou my true Word;
I ever with Thee
and Thou with me, Lord;
Thou my great Father,
I Thy true son;
Thou in me dwelling,
and I with Thee one.

Be Thou my battle Shield,
Sword for the fight;
Be Thou my Dignity,
Thou my Delight;
Thou my soul’s Shelter,
Thou my high Tower:
Raise Thou me heavenward,
O Power of my power.

Riches I heed not,
nor man’s empty praise,
Thou mine Inheritance,
now and always:
Thou and Thou only,
first in my heart,
High King of Heaven,
my Treasure Thou art.

High King of Heaven,
my victory won,
May I reach Heaven’s joys,
O bright Heaven’s Sun!
Heart of my own heart,
whatever befall,
Still be my Vision,
O Ruler of all.

~~~~~

I love this hymn! God should be my main focus in everything I do and say. The 4th verse is especially challenging to me.

Following At a Distance

In Matthew 26:33-35, we see Peter and the other disciples earnestly declaring that they will never desert their Lord. A short time later, Matthew says that "A large mob, with swords and clubs" descended upon the small group and arrested Jesus. This frightening scene would scare anyone, and the disciples were no exception. We read in verse 56 that they "deserted Him and ran away," despite their passionate "loyalty." What a turn-around!

In the very next verses, we watch Peter "following at a distance right to the high priest's courtyard." Peter, the first one to state his loyalty, followed Jesus at a distance.

As I read this passage, I started to wonder, "How do I 'follow at a distance'?" Well, I "follow at a distance" when I fail to seek after and follow Christ, either because I don't want to "get my hands dirty," or because I don't want to be known as "old-fashioned." This includes the times when I join my friends in watching a not-so-great movie, simply to avoid being labeled as "that conservative, sheltered kid." I also "follow at a distance" when I greet the unpopular girl at my church just enough to seem polite...and yet avoid showing a real interest in her life because I don't want to "put myself out." It includes the times when I grow lazy in Bible study and prayer because I don't "feel like it" (just like the disciples in verse 40). Wow...I really do "follow at a distance" sometimes! Yes, I'm guilty of all the aforementioned sins. And those sins make me guilty of denying Christ, just like Peter did.

Yet...

Christ forgives! Several months ago, our pastor preached from Mark 16 about Christ's resurrection. He pointed out, with tears in his eyes, that when the angels talked to the women at the tomb, they said, "...go, tell His disciples and Peter, 'He is going ahead of you to Galilee; you will see Him there just as He told you.'" And Peter. Why did Jesus include those words in His message to the disciples? Peter was one of "the disciples." Jesus didn't need to name him specifically! He included those words, Pr. Gerry said, to express his forgiveness to Peter. Peter was intensely ashamed of his denial of Christ. Mark 14:72 says, "When he thought about it, he began to weep." Perhaps Peter was so ashamed that he felt as though he had lost his Lord's favor. Yet Christ specifically says, "tell [my] disciples and Peter." He wanted to reassure Peter of His love and forgiveness...Peter was still Christ's disciple and friend!

Isn't that so encouraging? Even when we are guilty of following Christ at a distance, He still loves us. He has payed our price, and He forgives and cleanses! We are permanent members of His family, no matter what we've done! Thank you Lord!

One more thought...despite Peter's denial, Judas' betrayal, and his disciples' disloyalty, Christ still died for them...and us! He didn't throw up His hands and say, "Father, why should I die for these losers?!?!?! They just betrayed me!" Instead, He loved...unconditionally. Wow. How amazing!!

Loving Others...

One of the books I've been reading is called "Being a Girl Who Loves" by Shannon Kubiak Primicerio. This book has been very thought provoking for me personally. Today I was reading a chapter entitled "Every Hour of Every Day." The author described how challenging it is to continue in love, since "if you are anything like me, your attitudes of self-sacrifice and service are short-lived (pg 88)." She compares our "supply" of love to a car's fuel tank, and throughout this chapter, she talks about the need to go to Christ to refuel when our love has run dry. Below is a section which I found helpful.

Look at how John describes himself in John 21:20: "Peter, turning around, saw the disciple whom Jesus loved following them; the one who also had leaned back on His breast at the supper, and said, 'Lord, who is the one who betrays you?'"
Verse 24 confirms that John is talking about himself here. But think about that for a moment. Instead of simply saying, "Peter turned and saw me" or "Peter turned and saw John," it says Peter turned and saw the disciple whom Jesus loved, the one who had leaned on Jesus' breast. John was known as the disciple who loved....It was common for John to operate on a full love tank. After all, he was the "beloved disciple."
In 1 John 4:7-8 he tells us: "Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God; and everyone who loves is born on God and knows God." He's also the one who told us in John 3:16 that "God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish, but have eternal life."
...John was a disciple who loved because he knew how much he was loved. Early on--commentators and theologians say when he was just a teenager, not older than fifteen or sixteen--John learned the art of leaning back on Jesus' breast. He learned the art of intimacy with Christ, always going straight to the Lord to fill his love tank. And when people asked him who he was, he answered, "I'm the disciple Jesus loves."
Knowing that--and basking in it--kept John's love tank full. And with a full love tank he was able to love others more effectively. Those who know how much they are loved love much. Do you know how much you are loved?

This was a challenge to me personally; too many times, I grow lazy in loving others. Sometimes I just don't try because it's too hard. Sometimes I rely on my own strength...and I KNOW that doesn't work! But if I choose to focus on how Christ loved/loves me, this will motivate me to respond in love, even when my natural reaction is to respond in irritation or frustration.

SEEK HIS FACE WITH ME!
LOVE~BRIANNA

Trusting Him...

Sooo...lately I've started thinking about trusting God...and I read these really cool verses on the subject yesterday.

Those who trust in the Lord are like Mount Zion. It cannot be shaken; it remains forever. Jerusalem--the mountains surround her. And the Lord surrounds His people, both now and forever.
Psalm 125:1-2

Isn't that so encouraging? If I trust God, I "cannot be shaken..." Ultimately, I cannot be defeated because God is on my side! In fact, He "surrounds" me! No matter what happens, if I trust in God, I can have peace and confidence, knowing that He is in control. He will not allow anything into my life that won't be for my ultimate good. Thank you Lord!

BTW...here is link to a great article I read today on the Rebelution website:
A Lesson From the Vikings: Do Hard Things

SEEK HIS FACE WITH ME!
LOVE~BRIANNA